Changes in lfe

I still can't keep up with the changes that are constantly happening and taking effects in my life. Especially the changes in people and myself. What is happening? I have been trying to maintain the old relationships or more accurately, to beg people not to leave me behind. I'm aware that this is the age when people move on from the pre-adulthood to adulthood. This phase in life has turned into a catastrophe, which forced me to recognize life as a shattered puzzle piece that requires me to put them back together whenever it constantly breaks apart on its own. I want to have some control over all those changes, yet it feels like I'm the only one who is always behind of everyone. People change and move on without even leaving a lament glance, yet I can't even stop my stubborn mind from telling me to maintain what seem to be valid.

It is hard to feel left behind by the people I used to run along with. Or maybe arriving at adulthood really means we depart and set off for a new place to rid of the old and to welcome the new. Yet why do I always feel I'm alone in this transitioning? Are we suppose to embrace loneliness before acquiring the power of being independent? There is still too many veiled truth in the transitioning to adulthood and in becoming a matured person. I'm still trapped in the maze of finding myself. Is this a game that I have to play in order to get out?If it is, I must be lost in the middle of playing and desperately need for guidance. I hope if miracle still do exist that someone would hear my hopeless cry and come to give me a guidance on what I need to do in order to make sense of all the traumas that are happening. Fears won't leave me alone, and I'm too much on my own that I'm afraid I will collapse in confusion and never reach my goals...